My 1st Voting Experience

Quick & easy.  Just like it’s supposed to be.  Just how them GBE boys will light this whole shit up if Obama loses.  Not that they even care.  But yea.  Speed dial.

Anyway, it was cold as shit this morning and the line to vote was dick & butt.  Can of sardines.  Luckily,  it wasn’t packed enough for the line to be sticking out the building when I got there.  So here’s what happened.

  • I waited in a line that made me feel I was coming out of there with government cheese & Corn Flakes.
  • The man in charge of my district was damn near Michael J. Fox, the way he was shaking.  I felt bad for his nervous system.
  • I immediately lost all sympathy for the old geezer when he misspelled my name on the card.  When have you ever heard of a nigga named “Angle”?  Tha FUCK!
  • Walked my ass to the private booth & filled in a bunch of bubbles for unfamiliar names.  Except for maybe like 3.  Which is still horrible.  (I never claimed to be into politics anyway.)
  • Scanned my sheet & handed the dude next to the machine my card & folder like if they were keys to a Bentley & he was the valet.
  • Walked out and noticed the line sticking out the building, snapped a pic, chuckled, & walked away to Jay-Z’s “PSA” with the utmost, morning “I just voted for my 1st time” swag.

As I walked away, I wondered “How can you be so sure about who you want to represent this nation if you can’t even read signs & stand in the proper lines?  Wow, these people are complete nincompoops”.  But what do I know?  I’m just a renegade who’s eyes glisten with hope at the thought of Obamacare like an anime cartoon.  Wait, can I still be a renegade even though I just voted?  Nah, right?  Blah.  Whatever.  Maybe, just maybe …. I can live a life a little less cautious and mosh at concerts without having to pretend my body is an item at an antique store.  “You break, you paaaay!” (Old Korean lady voice) Or should I say “blake” ….. hee hee hee.

I had no intentions of voting until last minute.  I just decided, why not?  I mean, I did watch all the debates.  Even though they were all pretty much the same shit.  A bunch of lying, polite ass rebuttals and a few jabs.  And Mitt Romney’s listening face.


GO VOTE!  (Unless you don’t want to.  Fuck it.)
Peace, my nigs.  *rides donkey in African safari, tossing molotovs at elephants* (only figuratively)


4 thoughts on “My 1st Voting Experience

  1. I’m proud of you for getting up early and just going because why not. Good yob. And did they hover over you when you scanned your ballot like they did me? I had two old niggos posted on either side of me, “helping” me put my ballot in. Hmm….

      • Maybe because you look like un Arabe. YISSSSSS. You know how they feel about bearded people. Anyway I was rolling at the “Angle” part. In NC they don’t require ID, just that you state your name and address, but the lady who put me into the system just ASSumed that I was with Junior. And she was right. But still, I was kind of pissed.

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