Silent Savagery

Nobody likes to be called ‘crazy’.

There are 2 types of crazy people.  The ones who don’t know they’re crazy and deny when confronted and the ones that accept it and use their unstable mind wisely.  People who refuse to believe that they might be a little looney are the ones that are publicly perceived as crazy.  If you accept it and learn to prioritize your mentally strange tendencies, you can be insane and the world doesn’t even have to know.   Be a savage on the low.  As a nutcase, the last thing you want is for people to drive you even crazier with their objections and opinions about you.

Nobody likes to be called ‘annoying’.

There are 2 types of annoying people.  The ones who don’t know they’re annoying and the ones who know but choose to make your life a living hell anyway.  I don’t know which one is worse.  There certainly isn’t a less annoying one.  But there’s always a way around everything.  Try your best to keep these traits concealed in public.  Don’t be a clingy, garrulous prick around strangers.  Your life WILL be ruined as soon as you discover billboards all over the city with your face on it that reads, “Avoid this mofo at all costs.”  Be a savage on the low.  Be obnoxious at home, with your loved ones.  This way, you can’t be disowned or kicked out. … Just hated temporarily.   Better yet, learn to not be annoying at all.

Nobody likes being called a ‘pig’.

There are 4 types of pigs.  The ones that have no shame, the ones that don’t know any better, cops and hogs.  But fuck swine and authorities for now.  Let’s focus on mannerisms.  Whether you eat messily or try to see how many fingers you can shove up your nose, try keeping it classy in public.  Be a savage on the low.  Tickle your brain when you’re home.  Imitate Jim Levenstein and try penetrating an apple pie for all I care.  As long as it’s done where no one can see that fuckery.  No pun intended.

Nobody likes to be called ‘unproductive’.

There are 2 types of unproductive people.  The ones that try to SEEM productive by being extra and the ones who keep extra quiet and actually do things when no one’s looking.  The 2nd type is actually productive but doesn’t let anybody know, therefore they’re deemed unproductive.  Being labeled as one won’t faze anybody who actually produces.  This person is producing like a savage on the low and now is placed in a win-win situation.  Being perceived as idle allows you to back out of events you’re invited to with the “I don’t have any money” excuse.  In reality, you’re economically comfortable.

Result:  You now have 100% freedom with the money you worked hard to acquire.  (Of course, this will be misconstrued and classified as a lie.  But with the freedom you have to spend YOUR way, that lie will ultimately become a truth when the money depletes.)

We need to wise up, folks.  Let’s keep our habits and quirks invisible.  “Silent Savagery” is the way to go.

Hasta la vista, baby…  *pumps iron in “zero gravity” space shuttle*


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